Sara's Blog • It Takes a Village

This entry is coming straight from my heart. It is not intended to sound needy or desperate, just an honest summary of something I have noticed in my life and other women's lives as well. I have very few true friends. There. I said it. Now, I totally have lots of great acquaintances and people that I enjoy chatting with, but I mean TRUE friends. I've been thinking about this ever since Emma and I had a conversation about what she did at preschool that day. It went something like this:

"Emma, how was school today?"

"It was good."

"What did you do?"

"Well, Sydnee's not my best friend anymore. Bella is. Sydnee and me were best friends, but she wanted to play with Scarlett instead. So now, Sydnee and Scarlett are best friends and me and Bella are best friends."

"Oh. Well, can't you all be best friends?"

"No, but maybe we'll be best friends again next week."

All through life, friends come and go. We have close friends in elementary school, different friends in middles school, high school, and college. Now that I'm married and have children, it is super hard to make close friends. Anybody else feel that way? I have a couple of ideas about why.

• We are sooooooooooo busy! Never before have I been as busy as I am now. With my job, cleaning the house, preparing meals, taking Emma to dance practice, working out, trying to fit in time with John David, and a little time to rest, there's not a whole lot of time left for friends. It is easy to make myself feel guilty for letting those other things slide to have some girl time.
• It's difficult to trust people with personal issues. As a teenager, I learned some hard lessons. One of those is that you can't tell just anyone your business or it will turn around and bite you. Sadly, it seems to be the same way with adults. People, especially women, can be pretty mean.!
  

• Sometimes, it is just easier to stay in my little world. It takes effort to get out of my comfort zone, lay myself out there and say "Hey! This is me. Want to be my friend?" I love how easy it is for Emma to walk up to a little girl at the park and make friends with her. Why can't I do that? I've been sitting in the lobby at Emma's dance class with the same moms for nine months now and have only had a real conversation with one of them. Sheesh!
  

Does anyone else feel that way? Now that you're married, have children, and have your own thing going, have friendships taken a backseat? The Lord wants us to have friends. In fact, He calls a person with many friends "rich!" (Proverbs 14:20). It is so important for us to have someone outside of our family to encourage, share life with, and lean on in hard times.

The Bible also warns us to choose our friends wisely. Proverbs 18:24 says "One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother." Proverbs 12:26 says "The righteous choose their friends wisely but the way of the wicked leads them astray." It is wise to be cautious with who you call a "friend." It is great to be friendly, but you don't have to call everyone your "friend."

Now, you may not have any trouble trusting people, making friends, and setting aside time for them. Good for you! I wish I had that balance in my life right now. But, if you are like me, I have a challenge for you. This week, call someone that you desire to get to know better, someone that you could see yourself enjoying spending time with, and schedule an outing together. It could be a play date with the kids, a couples outing with your spouses, inviting a family over, or just going to grab coffee. Whatever it is, don't put this off! Ask the Lord to show you who He has placed in your life as a friend and make it happen. You won't regret it.

I remember the day I asked Jesus into my heart. It was July 6th, and I was 9 years old, sitting in the back of my mom's minivan after our Wednesday night church service. I remember praying that special prayer and feeling the peace and comfort of knowing that I could have the hope that only comes through a relationship with Jesus Christ. Being the independent child I was, I prayed the prayer by myself, then told my mom what I had done. We were all excited, told our pastor, and I was baptized that summer in the river. 

I had the awesome privilege of being present when my daughter asked Jesus to be her Lord and Savior. On Sunday, April 22nd, Emma Kate Hughes was born...again! Here's how it happened: 

Emma has been taking a class at The Fellowship called Jump Start. It is a 4 week class for kids who have recently become Christians or are interested in learning more about it. Overall, it's an amazing class. She had just finished the second week, and we came home after church to eat a quick lunch before heading back to church for LEAD Time. We talked about what she learned in Jump Start and mentioned that one of the boys in her class had asked Jesus into his heart that day. She said "I've been wanting to do that for weeks now!" I had to leave for LEAD Time shortly after lunch, but we made sure to tell Emma that after I got home, we would talk more about becoming a Christian. 

LEAD Time went well, but all I could think about was that this could be the night that Emma becomes my sister in Christ! I hurried home, got Amelia into bed, and gathered Emma and John David upstairs in the playroom. I said "Emma, why do you need to ask Jesus into your heart?" She said, and I quote, "Because the wages of sin is death!" It was hilarious, and so sweet. She told me what sin is (something that makes God sad), and that sin was standing between her and God. John David explained that God had a gift He wanted to give to her and that all she had to do was ask for it and take it. She said the prayer, admitting she was a sinner, believing that Jesus is God's son and that He died for her sins, and confessing Jesus as her Lord and Savior. At that moment, my little Emma became my sister in Christ. She became white as snow. We all cried and hugged each other, and it was a moment I will never forget. Definitely one of my best days ever.

It is amazing to me that God made the way to Him so simple that a 5 year old can really understand it. All you have to do is admit, believe, and confess. Someone once told me that they couldn't understand how such a "loving" God could only give us one way to heaven or how He would let some people spend eternity in hell. My response was this: I can't understand how such a holy God would give us ANY way to spend eternity in heaven with him! 

I hope that you have had that experience and that you know without a doubt that you will be at the banquet table in heaven partying with the angels one day. If you haven't, what are you waiting for? Today is a great day to start your story.